Another month, another period- *dramatic sigh*. While you may be dreading the cramps, crying and cravings, I’ve consulted the stars and am here to deliver good news: IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY!!! Check out your sign below to learn how to make your next cycle suck less. Happy bleeding everyone!
ARIES: March 21 - April 19
You are the first sign of the zodiac and also the best (cough cough, I’m an Aries obvs). We’re ruled by Mars the God of War, so we’re FIERCE. But our periods can be even fiercer. So what do we do when our periods get us down? We do what makes us feel best- we WIN. Little rams, you already play a million sports, so all that exercise will help with the cramps. And all that winning will boost your mood. We are #1 after all, even when it is our time of the month.
TAURUS: April 20 - May 20
Let’s get real Taurus, you know you’re fab! However, you may not feel super fab when Aunt Flo comes knocking. Luckily you’re homebodies, so you already have everything you need in the comfort of your own bedroom to make you feel GLAMOROUS again. Snuggle up in bed, queue up 7 rings, whip out that laptop and online shop as much as your heart (or allowance) desires. Retail therapy honey! Get into it!
GEMINI: May 21 - June 20
Gemini, sometimes you get a bad rap. Just know I would never rag on you (rag, get it? lol), especially when it’s your time of the month. Remember, you’re ruled by Mercury, which is the planet of communication. So all you have to do is harness that power when your period makes you want to disappear. Take some time to journal out your feels (Dear Diary, Ugh left on read again? ME???), or catch up with old friends. Actually… u know what? You’re the twin constellation. DO BOTH SIS!
CANCER: June 21 - July 22
You are a loving and super caring little soul Cancer! But when things aren’t going your way sometimes you can get a bit….crabby. Forgive the pun, but when you’re in a mood, you’re in a mood. And nothing gets you in a mood like being on your period. So how do you dip back into your sweet and sensitive side? Find a great place to volunteer in your community. It sounds simplistic but it’s true-- helping others feel better will make you feel better. Everyone wins!
LEO: July 23 - August 22
If you look up “Superstar” in the dictionary, there’s a picture of you where the definition would be. If your bright light is dimming when it’s your time of the month, all you have to do is remind yourself (and the world) of your STAR POWER! Thrust yourself back into the spotlight by going to karaoke with your pals. You’ll get to serenade the period blues away and your friends will have to start campaigning for your inevitable Grammy award. And the winner goes to....you! For not letting your period get you down! *cues the applause*
VIRGO: August 23 - September 22
You are such a perfectionist and we love that about you. Your locker is pristine. Your handwriting is basically Helvetica. And your Instagram grid? Curated by colour babe! You love a plan, but sometimes your period shows up to ruin it. If it’s making you feel out of sync, recenter yourself by doing a big bedroom re-org. Move furniture around, tear down posters of pop stars past, and start a donation pile of clothes you’re not in love with. Freshening up your space will definitely make you feel fresh again. Now mark that down in your bullet journals!
LIBRA: September 23 - October 22
Libra, you’re ruled by Venus the planet of ~*love*~ and it’s easy to see why. Just ask anyone- you’re peaceful, fair and the most beloved friend anyone could have. One thing you don’t love? Making decisions. Settling on a plan can be s.t.r.e.s.s.f.u.l, just like your period. When your friend in red makes an appearance, call upon your actual pals to help you out. Make them arrange a movie night -- they owe you after all! Your BFFs will choose the location, the movie, the snacks and the games. You just show up. Now sit back, relax, and enjoy your period!
SCORPIO: October 23 - November 21
If anyone is going to declare world domination, it’s going to be you Scorpio! And while you’ll *hopefully* run the world as a superhero, your period may have you acting like a straight up villain. Cross over to the light again by learning how to use your powers for good. Figure out a cause you’re passionate about and research what you can do to make an impact. Whether it be the welfare of animals or dismantling the patriarchy, you’re a trailblazer. Who run the world? You! On your period!
SAGITTARIUS: November 22 - December 21
Sagittarius, you’ve never asked for permission before, so why would you suddenly bend the knee to Aunt Flo? The last fire sign of the zodiac, you are independent, creative and always looking for a worldly adventure. Unfortunately when your period has you feeling constrained, you probably can’t just like, drop everything and escape to Paris (sigh you have school tmrw). Instead, take an afternoon for yourself and go to an art gallery. Sometimes, simply pretending you’re in Europe can be the best distraction for cramps!
CAPRICORN: December 22 - January 19
You do ANYTHING you set your mind to Capricorn. PERIOD. If you added Everest to your vision board today, you’d already be at the top tomorrow. You’re always ready for a challenge, but sometimes your period is the challenge. So how do you climb the metaphorical mountain that is menstruation? Get in the kitchen and try out a difficult new recipe. Accomplishing a task is what you do best, and your creation will help satisfy any of your wicked period cravings. Mountain, CLIMBED baby!
AQUARIUS: January 20 - February 18
That band everyone likes? You listened to them 5 years ago. Those tiny lil sunglasses? Puhleaaase, you wore them out of the womb. That trending conspiracy theory? You’ve already debunked it. Even though Aquarians are ALWAYS ahead of the curve, sometimes your period can make you feel sOOOo last year. To perk yourself back up, do what only you can do best: TREND. Start a monthly zine that chronicles all the eccentric things you love and share it with your friends. If they don’t really “get it”, that means you’re doing it right. Trend? Set! Period? Conquered!
PISCES: February 19 - March 20
You are compassionate and emotional little fishies swimming in an ocean full of deep feels. There’s always a lot going on in that head of yours, and it’s easy for you to be swallowed whole during shark week. Thankfully, you CAN prevent the crimson wave from drowning you. Just practice your fav kind of self care: napping. That’s right! Just go to sleep! You’ll get some much needed quiet alone time, and so will your brain. When you wake up, you’ll be well rested, reset, and ready to go with the flo. Sweet dreams!
My dear friends, that’s all from the stars this month! See you in April for your next cycle ;)